Thoughts on Motherhood // It's Not Easy

(November 2013)

Growing up I always wanted to be a teacher and later on wanted to be a mom.
At 19 I became a mother for the first time. It was pure bliss. 
We started homeschooling when Aubrey was 4. By choosing to homeschool, I was now a teacher. Both of my childhood dreams had come true.

Kade is born. Fast forward a couple years. Then I'm starting to realize, this motherhood thing is hard. Really hard.

Motherhood is...Waking up at night by sweet little voices say, "mommy can I sleep with you?"  Sleepless nights when your littles are sick. Early mornings when you keep refilling your coffee cup wondering when you're going to "wake up". The piles of laundry that never seem to go down. The fighting of the kids. Constantly reminding them to love like Jesus. Nap time, and you realize that you need to use this "quiet" time to get caught up, yet you know you won't really ever get caught up. Legos, ninja turtle action figures, ponies, and puzzle pieces are scattered across the living room floor. Fingerprints on everything. Baths that turn into pools on the bathroom floor. Bedtime prayers and kisses. Staying up late to make sure the house is clean and ready for tomorrows mess. Going to bed and realizing you will do it all again tomorrow. 

"Our daily grind, is holy ground. The love that ignites in our home has the power to change history."

-Tiffany Gray (thegraygang)

Yes, its hard. 

"This job has been given to me to do.  Therefore, it is a gift.  Therefore, it is a privilege.  Therefore, it is an offering I make to God.  Therefore, it is to be done gladly, if it is done for Him.  Here, not somewhere else, I may learn God's way.  In this job, not in some other, God looks for faithfulness."

-Elisabeth Elliot

Slowing down and realizing how these things that seem to stress and break me, are some of life's greatest blessings.  One day the kids will be grown and gone.  My house will be quiet and spotless. I'll be getting a full nights sleep. And I will miss it all.

Now, this is a beautiful and messy season of life we're in. The Lord has given me a hard job, but the most important job. And I will embrace it all.